You may have notice on the last post that my high school life is amazing, and it issss. Im so happy for that! I got to know many new people and now I have a “squad”. Some of them closer than the other, but its good. I have been excited for so long to meet new faces, just start a new friendship with people and have fun. My theory was that I could get happier, and I am! Things are getting so much better now. I just have to prevent myself from falling back on the previous position were I was feeling extremely lonely, even doe I had friends.
But you know what kind of friends you need. People that can make you smile, someone you can share thoughts with and just relax, and have fun. Like, its comfortable to be yourself. Im getting there! Im wishing god the best for myself. I still have a long way to go, but Delapsus Resurgam, right?
To all my 8 followers (or anyone), you`re probably wondering: “what happened?” Well, nothing happened. I have been around the country. I was supposed to meet my best friend from England, but she missed the damn flight and that shit got me mad. I was angry for weeks (not at her, It wasnt her fault)
Besides losing the opportunity to meet that one thing that would change my summer, I have been crying, thinking, trying -lots of trying and of course working on myself. And, yes, I feel better now! Not much better, but better. Its something right?
In the end of summer holiday I told my dad mostly everything about my struggles in life. Why Im acting differently compared to before. Well, I didnt tell him, but I had to. I was in a middle of a serious discussion with him and I had to, or he wouldnt understand. He would think that i was just another unthankful little youth in this world, So I finally did it. Ever since that day, my family finally knew me better.
Right now Im feeling less lonely. Its really hard to open up. I still struggle a lot with my anxiety. But again, its a little better now. Sometimes theres days where I feel either very sad and lonely, sometimes panicking or just angry. My moods are varying.
But anyways, this blog isnt going to be a “Im-sad-blog” because Im not just sad. I still have a personality, and things that makes me happy. Its time to show the good things, because I want to make people smile
I just moved here two years ago and the second year is going shit. Maybe that’s it? I`m not happy here + I need a friend. Maybe that’s why I`m so excited for High School, getting out of this Island I live in and get new friends. Well damn, welcome to Norway! A country full of teenagers with bad Psychal health + the country with me most one night stands btw. *claps slowly*
.. I`m not sure why I feel this way. I feel like I`m stressed without having any reasons to be stressed about. Its like over reacting my life, because I`m bored. I am soooo tired of the people around me here. When I meet new people I`m always happy and excited. (`m a very lovely girl btw.. and funny hah) I love getting new friends and I don’t have a best friend. Or I do have, but they don’t know that I don’t feel the same (this just made me feel worse lol.
That’s why I neeeed to do something about it.
I`m going to start a plan. I need good health and a fresh brain. I really need to clear my mind, because I think too much and I`m negative on myself. It’s a big problem for my daily life. I`m so tired of everything, I don’t want to do anything anymore.
I will inform you all of my plans in another post and I`m going to document this. Yeah I know. You may be thinking: “oh wow, Your making a big deal out of this” Well it is.
As you can see on the title, my life is not that exciting..That`s why I`m writing a upcoming post about, why Its important for me to not just come home from school everyday and doing nothing. By nothing I mean “make food, sleep, homework, web and sleep” (workout will be there soon) In the weekend I usually just watch series or game. I`m barely out hanging with my friends, but that`s another topic (I will write about soon;)
Anyways…Today I decided to finally make waffles, because…I need to start doing things by myself. I usually ask my sisters or my mom to make them, while I`m lazy all the time. hehe…They are so nice to me when it comes to food, because I cant cook. I take that as a positive thing even doe it is a negative.
After making some 10 waffles and decided to share for once haha, I gamed almost the rest of the day actually (yepp, I`m a gamer. Let me know if you are too 😉
Well, right now I cant decide whether to watch PewDiePie or Game Of Thrones before I go to bed. I guess it will be none, bc I`ve used so much time thinking
..Anyone having these kinds of problems all the time?